A letter to the conservative women of America
Two weeks ago, I wrote a letter to your male counterpart. Perhaps you read it and shook your head, angry at this upstart liberal trollop who dared insult the patriot you love. My letter to you will be less of a rant and more… well, sadly curious.
The theme of this missive is empathy, which you seem to lack entirely. Now, I don’t think just because we both have a vagina, we should necessarily agree on everything but again, you say and believe things that are the antithesis of an empathetic human being. Especially when it comes to other women. You have no remorse or understanding of the damage you do, and this strange disconnect saddens and confuses many people.
For example, after the murder of Kassandra Perkins, Dana Perino said women in violent relationships should “make better decisions” and you agreed. I know this because I read comment after comment, stating that women who were victims of domestic violence were “weak” and “could leave” whenever they wanted to, as if it was a woman’s choice to remain in that terrifying situation.
Do you know what it’s like to be in a violent relationship, poor, trapped and alone? To have no money, no options, nowhere to go but back each and every day to a man who uses violence and rage to control you? I do. Leslie Morgan Steiner does.
Why do you blame rape victims for their own assaults? Phyllis Schlafly wrote an oped in January of this year regarding the rampant sexual violence in the military that included this startling statement:
“Military women are already complaining about increased sexual assaults, and of course those problems will skyrocket. Only men will be deemed at fault because it is feminist ideology that men are innately batterers and women are victims.”
Liz Trotta, a Fox contributor, made similar comments about the increase in sexual assault, adding:
“And the sexual abuse report says that there has been, since 2006, a 64% increase in violent sexual assaults. Now, what did they expect? These people are in close contact, the whole airing of this issue has never been done by Congress, it’s strictly been a question of pressure from the feminist.”
Which is what you think about rape. It’s blown way out of proportion, most rape allegations are false, the woman “deserved” it because of the way she was dressed, she’d been drinking, she said yes then changed her mind. You defended the rapists in Ohio and shamed the teenage girl they raped.
Yes, we have women on the left side of the political aisle who have said some fairly horrible things about rape (Whoopi Goldberg always comes to mind), but in recent years it’s you, Conservative Woman who spends your time victim shaming and blaming.
Oh, and your “pro-life” claim. Explain this to me, please. You believe life begins at conception and abortion should be outlawed, but when a poor woman gives birth, you don’t want your tax dollars helping her feed, clothe or care for that baby.
No low-cost or free lunches, no WIC, no SNAP, no CHIP, nothing. Maybe you agree with Texas Republican Jodie Laubenberg when she said in 2007 that those fetuses you call people don’t deserve help because “they’re not born yet.” Which of course isn’t “pro-life,” but neither is supporting the death penalty.
Pregnancy from rape is a gift from God according to Sharon Barnes and Richard Mourdock and former presidential candidate Rick Santorum. I was raped (wearing a tee shirt and surfer shorts, BUT I had been drinking so I must have deserved it). What if I had gotten pregnant?
I hear over and over again that women, if they don’t want to keep the fetus can find an adoption agency. Um, no. And here’s why. Adoption forms have an entire section just for information about the father. If you’re raped in a parking lot by a stranger, what exactly are you supposed to write; he was taller than me and left 5 perfect fingerprint bruises on my neck? Oh and he was white/black/Hispanic/sort of tall/maybe shorter than tall/blue/green/brown/hazel/black eyes and maybe a beard/mustache/sideburns/clean shaven/he was wearing shoes. Tell me how that works.
Conservative Woman, you make me sad. Earlier last year I said if a woman voted Republican, she must hate herself. I still believe that. Look what your party is doing. Your presidential nominee, Mitt Romney blamed single parent households for gun violence. Seriously.
Ann Coulter thinks liberal women shouldn’t vote, which is a change from her previous belief that women in general shouldn’t vote. Allen West’s former campaign manager Joyce Kaufman stood in the parking lot of a mini mall and shouted “If ballots don’t work, bullets will.” Men are “designed” to be the breadwinner.
I will never be a Conservative Woman, because I don’t see the same world you do. In my world, feminists are just women who want to be treated as more than chattel or brood mares. In my world, the poor need help, Walmart does not.
In my world, the middle class are the job creators, not Mitt Romney. And in my world, survivors of domestic and sexual violence are heroes to be looked up to, not pariahs to be looked down on. So, please tell me how as a woman you can be a conservative, because I truly do not understand.