We now know how much the Tea Party is willing to sacrifice and why professional wrestlers make good politicians.

government shutdownAs predicted, the U.S. Government opened back up in a narrow escape from default. It was a weird ride that concluded in the same scripted way as last time: Minutes before the deadline, a deal was made. Most of us could already foresee the outcome before the government shutdown started, the only thing missing were the details. Aside from with the $24 billion cost to the economy, there were a few other things I didn’t think of before the shutdown started. Here are 3 things I learned from the government shutdown.

#3 – A small, but very loud faction of a party is willing to go to unheard of extremes to hold the rest of the government hostage. Yes, the Tea Party express cruised right through on this one. The shutdown was something they planned from the beginning; however, much like a child, they foresaw a completely different ending. They thought their tantrum fueled agenda would push the U.S. into negotiating with terrorists.

Yes, the Tea Party are terrorists. They are a minority who use scare tactics and take hostages in order to increase their own power in the guise of social change. Much like the weaponized terrorist, they also use their powers of persuasion on the base level of the poor in order to use them as a weapon against their own good.

Without their hyperbolic scare tactics, the Tea Party would be nothing more than clowns dressed up a few weeks too early for Halloween. They, and their rhetoric is for all intents, more Trick than Treat.

#2 – The citizens of the U.S. have people in office who reflect them, and they deserved the government shutdown. Let’s face it, you lot voted these people in based upon empty rhetoric and fear-mongering. It’s time you reap what you sow.

We’ve become an ultra-consumer based public concerned more about the imaginary ending to Breaking Bad than the very real ending a cold winter can do to a neighbor. The Tea Party didn’t sprout from Mars – they are home-grown. They are the “best” of the bunch at drumming up a crowd while they fleece them (at the same time insisting the fleecing is business as usual).

Do you need proof that the Tea Party leaders are tailor made to reach out to the more base of human natures? Take a second to look at their platform and then look at their own lives.

Take a random picture of Sarah Palin and her family. Then look at the platform of principles she ran to the public with. Does the image reflect the words? Does her family of out-of-wedlock teen pregnancies match her ultra-conservative approach on marriage and sexual relations?

Now, I haven’t even pointed out the actual emptiness of the rhetoric. The Tea Party pushes a “if you’re smart, you’re anti-American” kind of agenda. Not because they truly dislike smart people, but because they need to be the smartest of their bunch (as if that will ever happen).

Body Slam, wwe, government shutdown
If only that were Ted Cruz on top

#1 – Politics, as Jim Breuer has said, is Professional Wrestling. Two factions fighting it off. One faction is set in the view of the “good” while the other is the “bad guy”. Sure, if you like Republicans then the Democrats are the bad guy and vice versa, but the scenario is the same; this government shutdown only amplified the concept.

In Professional Wrestling, the outcome is pre-determined (much like the shutdown’s outcome was) it is in the details of getting there that make the match. We see each side talk on the mic before the event starts – we also see commentators taking sides.

Then, after talking to the crowd, both parties go into their battle ground and fight it out. Each opponent, dressed as an imaginary character, takes swings at the other in order to gain the upper hand. Along the way, the crowd will cheer for one and boo the other, but the crowd goes wild for any blood drawn. For their own effort, the opponents will self-inflict wounds in order to get support from the crowd and, at the end, right as time closes down, one person will swerve the other faction in order to finish the match. The whole thing ends with the winners cheering and the losers going, “we fought the hard fight” as they, outside of public view, get into their limos together and drive off on our dime.

At this point, can you be sure if I am describing Professional Wrestling or Politics? Let’s face it, we are one chair-shot away in the Senate from having this analogy become fully realized.


  1. Is it a voting in that makes the key or the cultural movement to even allow a Tea Party to rise? I believe it is due to the cultural momentum that gives rise to the apathy and lack of political interest (or just knowing about an issue without resorting to 15 second tv or internet blurbs) that gives rise to the conditions needed for the Tea Party to even have a candidate to vote for.

    I am not for Democrats; I am not for Republicans; I think the party system, as we have it now, breads nothing but whores.

  2. I don’t know that I agree we deserved the shutdown. Not all of us voted for Tea Party candidates, even in districts where they won. In fact, in 2012, Democrats running for the House got more popular votes, but Republicans won more seats because of redistricting.

    Claiming that Americans deserved the shutdown because some of us voted for the Republicans who shut down the government is like saying the whole class deserves detention because 5 kids refused to do their homework.

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