While there are similarities between the two main parties to be sure, there are enough differences to warrant voting

democrats and republicansWe have two political parties in America: Democrats and Republicans. As of this moment, those are our choices. Many people believe we need a third party, another option when it comes to elections, and they may be right. For now, however, we have Blue and Red. Some states are a lovely shade of Purple, some Violet while others could be considered Aubergine, but the two main colors are Red for Republican and Blue for Democrat.

Over the past few years, folks primarily left of center have been claiming Democrats and Republicans are the same. There is no difference between the two parties, they both suck. Quite a few of these people did not vote in 2010, and helped put the Tea Party into power. So, thanks for that <insert sarcasm font here>. And quite a few of those people have vowed not to vote in 2014 or 2016, because they truly believe by doing that, something will change. When I ask them what that change will be, typically they don’t really have an answer, it’s mostly about war, legalizing pot and Edward Snowden.

When President Obama was first elected, it seemed that we had a group of Americans who believed he had a magic wand hidden in his suit coat pocket. We would suddenly have ponies that fart glitter, a chicken in every Crock Pot™, all wars would suddenly cease, poverty would disappear and we’d walk around singing the theme from Coca Cola ads. Of course, that didn’t happen. I don’t even own a Crock Pot™, my glitter-farting pony has not arrived and we still have poor people and war.

That group became disheartened, seemingly overnight. He wasn’t liberal enough (he was never a liberal, kids, hate to break that to you), he wasn’t black enough (yes, I’ve actually heard that), he wasn’t fixing things fast enough (what three branches of government?) and no one had that pony. Stomping feet and frothing at the mouth ensued and suddenly, the parties were the same.

Guess what? No, really, guess. They’re not. The. Same. How do I know this? Read on, McDuff.

1) Name a Democratic congressperson who said a rape kit is the same thing as an abortion.

2) Name a Democratic congressperson who wants to give fetuses guns and brought Ted Nugent to a State of the Union address.

3) Name a Democratic congressperson who looked at the President of the United States and said “I cannot even stand to look at you.”

4) Name a Democratic senator who believes Muslim Americans never help fight terrorism.

5) Name a Republican politician or pundit who publicly decried the actions of David Vitter (diapers and hookers), John Ensign (bribery, adultery) and/or Mark Sanford (Appalachian Trail hike that led to Argentina).

6) Name a Republican politician who slapped the hand of Bryan Fischer after Fischer said all gay men are Nazis.

7) Name a Republican politician who told Glenn Beck to shut up after he called  Senator Mary Landrieu a “prostitute.”

8) Name a Democratic politician who has said we are in the “End Times.”

9) Name a Republican politician who believes in evolution, and says so publicly.

10) Name a Democratic presidential candidate who ever said the Separation of Church and State makes him “want to throw up.”

democrats and republicans

Republicans want to teach the Bible in public school, make abortion illegal and contraception for women impossible to get, make marriage equality obsolete, plunder our natural resources, frack the living crap out of our watersheds, deregulate the government and engage in perpetual war by blowing up everyone brown. Remember “Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb Iran?”

Are there similarities? Of course. Both parties have candidates who run for office. Those candidates receive donations, take road trips, kiss babies and eat a lot of fast food. Both parties have an animal as their mascot. Both parties have problems. But they are not the same. One party wants to destroy the country I love. The other needs to grow a pair. In the words of the great Barney Frank: We’re not perfect, but they’re nuts.

Next year, we have the opportunity to begin the undoing of the harm caused by the GOP/Tea Party. But we cannot do that if a bunch of apathetic, ignorant asshats sit home, whining about some mythical glitter-farting pony that did not appear on their lawn. There’s no goddamn pony, there’s no magic wand, there’s this political process and we have to deal with it. We have to get them out of office. They are a danger to our national security, our global reputation, our credit rating and honestly, our sanity. We do that by voting. Hell, if you’re an African American, a woman or anyone other than a rich, white man, odds are, someone actually died for your right to vote.

Let’s get the Tea Party out, start the healing process and then work on fixing our political parties. It would be lovely to have real Republicans back, Republicans like Eisenhower. It would also be nice to have a few Democrats who are not beholden to Wall Street (Elizabeth Warren-2016). And the only way to make that happen is to vote.

The parties are not the same, we have the chance to fix this next year, whiners stop whining. Vote.


  1. I really get sick when I either hear or read people saying this.

    All you have to do is look at the race in my state (Virginia) right now for Governor, Lt. Gov, and Attorney General.

    Anyone who tries to tell me that: Cuckoo Ken Cuccinelli is the same as Terry McAuliffe; E.W. Jackson is just like Ralph Northam; and Mark Obenshain is just like Mark Herring is either a lunatic or on drugs. I’ve almost never seen an election with such polar opposites as choices.

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