Cruz 's Liberty University Speech and #TedCruzCampaignSlogans are just the beginning

It’s important to have fun every now and then. What better time than when Ted Cruz officially announces his candidacy for President of the United States. Ted Cruz has faced ridicule from liberals (and some conservatives) throughout his first two plus years as Texas’s Junior Senator. Cruz must be a sucker for punishment, cause it isn’t about to get any easier.

Ted Cruz is most famous for his 21 hour filibuster of Obamacare and it was here where the public first laughed at him. During his endless rant against the Affordable Care Act, Cruz read the entire “Green Eggs and Ham” book by Dr. Seuss and still, the actual meaning of the children’s book was lost on him.

The backwardness of Ted Cruz is well documented. See Cruz talk about net neutrality, NASA, and his immigration speech. Only Cruz could make someone like Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachmann look like a rocket scientist. He is the best fodder for late night comedians since Dan Quayle. I bet you Jon Stewart seriously reconsidered retirement upon hearing the news.

Even the platform with which his candidacy was launched is a farce. Cruz delivered his first official 2016 presidential campaign speech yesterday during a Convocation ceremony at Liberty University, a right-wing religious school in Lynchburg, Virginia. Convocation is a mandatory event on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays for Liberty students. If students refused to attend the Cruz Speech, they would have been fined!

ted cruz 2016I’m already convinced that Cruz is being paid to run by the RNC in order to make the other Republican candidates look more appealing. Anyway, as always it’s going to be a long presidential campaign, but at least it should be good for some laughs.

And it didn’t take long, liberals had the hash tag #TedCruzCampaignSlogans trending all day yesterday on Twitter. Here are some of my favorite Ted Cruz Campaign Slogans in 140 characters or less:

“Are you better off today than you were six thousand years ago?”
“Because I’m living, breathing proof that the birther movement is rooted in bigotry… not facts”
“Standing up 4 the conservative principle that a bag of cash from the Kochs weighs more than 13,000 scientific papers”
“Lose with Cruz”
“The only thing we have to fear is this list of things you can find on my campaign website”
“The candidate for those who found Michelle Bachman and Rick Perry intimidatingly intellectual”
“If you like “Green Eggs and Ham”…then I am your man!”
“If you are not right in the head…then vote for Ted!”
“A Dumb Texan with Daddy Issues. What Could Possibly Go Wrong?”
“If you think people who hate & sabotage the government ought to run it,”
“Don’t Be Blinded By Science!”
“Let’s Filibuster the Future…Together!”
“The dream of keeping poor people from seeing a Doctor will never die”

Seeing as how Cruz and I are both born at opposite ends in Canada, I saved my own for last:

“Elect a Canadian more conservative than Prime Minister Stephen Harper” – I know, not funny, just the simple truth…

2 COMMENTS

  1. The “mocks” in the blog are very funny but The Right Wing Republicans will not be amused and you can bet “the ranch” that they will be registered and they will vote! If the blue voters sit on their deriairs like they did in 2014, we won’t be laughing either. Be afraid, be very afraid.

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